What are some things I can do?

Remember that you have the control

If it is your page or account then you have the choice about what comments or posts can be seen.

What you leave out there is also a reflection on you and what you think is ok or how you feel about different things.

Delete comments or posts that make you uncomfortable or that you don’t want on your page or account.


Change your settings

Adjust your privacy settings so that you have more privacy.

This might mean making your account private or on Facebook changing the settings so that your account is ‘Friends only’ and you need to approve posts made to your timeline.

You can also change the settings in ‘Tagging’ so that no one (or only friends) can take you in photos.


Consider messaging the person directly (if they are a friend)

If it is a friend who is making posts or comments that are making you feel uncomfortable, you could message them directly to explain how you feel.

You might also want to check in if they’re okay.  They might be dealing with issues of their own or have something going on that is being played out on your Social Media.

They could even be reacting to something that has happened and not know how to talk to you privately about it.

Here are some tips for how you might do that:

  1. Comment on the issue, not the person. For example, “Your comment was rude” and not “You are rude.” “The post was not true” and not “You are a liar.”  This is where avoiding emotive language is also helpful.
  2. Don’t make personal attacks. Comments like “I’m so sick and tired of…” or “You’re so stupid / negative / lazy / uninformed / ” come across as adding ‘fuel to the fire’.  Stay away from attacks.
  3. Use passive voice.   “The comments made were racist” shifts attention away from the person and focuses of the comments rather than ” You made racist comments” which focuses on the person.
  4. Share how it affects you. Rather than go on and on about how bad the thing is, share how it affects you. This shifts the focus away from the person and onto yourself, which lets the person take a step back to evaluate the situation. It also gives him/her insight to where you are coming from.


Hide Comments

You can  hide comments from being able to be seen by people other than the person who made the comment and their friends.

The good thing about doing this is that they do not know (and they don’t get notified) that you have done this but no one outside of their friends will see the post or comment. It is a low key way to avoid potential issues.

This can also be effective if it is some of your family or workmates that you do not want to see something as out of context it could be taken the wrong way.

You can also ‘unhide’ a comment later if you choose to.


Delete Comments

You can delete comments or posts that make you uncomfortable, are offensive or that you don’t want to be seen on your page or account.

You also have the option on your page to remove the comment AND Block the person if it is really serious.


Mute the person

If emotions have got really high or an issue or drama has kicked off, on Facebook Groups if you are an admin or moderator, you can also ‘mute’ a user temporarily (1, 6, 12 or 24 hours) so that they cannot post or comment.

Block the person

If you have had to remove a number of the person’s comments or posts or if your relationship has changed, you can block them so that they can no longer post or comment in the group or on your page.

This can make some people really angry or upset when they find out, so do be prepared for this.  That does not mean you shouldn’t do it, just that you may also need to deal with it in person too.

You might also want to use the report tool if you think this could be helpful.