Nikita’s Story: Being asked over Snapchat
Nikita talks about chatting to someone over Snapchat and starting to really like him and then what happened when she said no to his request for nudes.
If this is the first time you’ve received nude images from this person, they may be experimenting with you or looking for a reaction or response.
If you ignore the message, this can often give the signal that you are not interested in seeing any more.
If someone you know sent you the photo or video (and you didn’t ask for it), you might want to simply ask “Why would you send me that picture?” and see what they say.
It might have been a genuine mistake or a misunderstanding. This gives them an opportunity to explain themselves before you decide what to do next (if anything).
Depending on your relationship with the sender and how you feel, you might want to consider letting them know that sharing nudes without permission could be against the law.
They may be unaware and think that it is a ‘bit of fun’ or that sending the image is ok.
Letting them know that there could be consequences for sharing the image could stop it from being shared further.
Stop the chance of receiving any more nudes from the person by blocking them.
Check out the icons below to find out how to do this on the different platforms
All Social Media platforms have reporting and Blocking tools and nudes would breach most of their standards.
Taking a screenshot of the photo and any messages sent alongside it can help you with your reporting.
Report the message using the steps below and think about stopping the chance of receiving any more nudes from the person by blocking them.
Check out the icons below to find out how to do this on the different platforms
If you need help, advice or support with any kind of online issue (including Nudes) , Netsafe can help.
They are a non-profit organisation with a helpline set up to help people with online safety and online issues.
Netsafe have years of experience in helping young people deal with harm online, their service is free and confidential.
Find out more by visiting their website or checking out the services section.
It can often be really weird, creepy or unsettling to receive a nude out of nowhere.
It can be helpful to share what happened with someone else so you can talk it through. You can get advice or work out whether you need to take it further.
It can sometimes be really tempting to share the photo with your friends as a ‘private joke’ or as part of a group chat.
Doing this, even within a closed group can make things spread really quickly and could put you at risk of having a complaint made against you for sharing a nude image without permission.
In New Zealand, if someone has shared nude photos or intimate images of you (or someone else) without permission, there are a number of laws they might be breaking.
This is ‘image based abuse’ and is a form of sexual harassment.
Images taken without Permission
Under the Crimes Act, there are criminal remedies (or possible solutions) when someone has or shares nudes or intimate images that have been taken WITHOUT someone’s permission.
Examples of this could be photos or video taken with a hidden camera or up someone’s skirt/dress.
Criminal Remedies
Criminal remedies could include a fine of up to $50,000 (for an individual) or up to two years in jail.
There are also criminal OR civil remedies under theThe Harmful Digital Communications Act (HDCA) if someone posts nudes or intimate images WITHOUT someone’s permission.
The criminal remedies do not apply to children (aged 0-13), but can be applied to young people aged 14-16 (within the youth justice system) and individuals aged 17+ (who are treated as adults within the formal criminal justice system).
Civil Remedies
Netsafe can support you with some civil remedies including working with both parties to reach a resolution, working with online content hosts (like Social Media platforms) but they cannot punish anyone or force them to do something.
Civil remedies could also involve a court order where a person can be forced to remove or delete content, give an apology or the identity of someone who posted anonymously revealed.
Images ORIGINALLY taken with permission but then shared
The Harmful Digital Communications Act (HDCA) has remedies if photos or intimate images that were originally taken with someone’s permission are then shared (without permission).
Examples of this could be photos taken by a partner for private use that are then shared in a group or uploaded to a public site after you have broken up.
There are criminal and civil remedies.
Criminal Remedies
Criminal remedies could include a fine of up to $50,000 (for an individual) or up to two years in jail.
The criminal remedies do not apply to children (aged 0-13), but can be applied to young people aged 14-16 (within the youth justice system) and individuals aged 17+ (who are treated as adults within the formal criminal justice system).
Civil Remedies
Netsafe can support you with some civil remedies including working with both parties to reach a resolution, working with online content hosts (like Social Media platforms) but they cannot punish anyone or force them to do something.
Civil remedies could also involve a court order to remove or delete content, get an apology or have the identity of someone who posted anonymously revealed.
What other laws that might apply
Other laws that could apply are:
For more DETAILED information about the laws above and your rights related to Nude Images, check out the Sticks ‘n Stones Website.
Helplines
Helplines are there to help if you want to talk (kōrero) with someone about what is going on and how it is making you feel.
You can also call if you know someone who may need help.
It’s completely okay to call or message a helpline – no problem is too big or small. You don’t have to ‘prove’ you deserve help.
It’s normal to worry about asking for help – but at Youthline we are here to listen and help you figure out what is right for you.
0800 376 633 24/7 support
free text 234 between 8am and midnight
or email talk@youthline.co.nz
Online Chat
Youthline’s online chat service is open between 7pm-11pm
A safe place for you to talk about anything at all.
0800 942 8787 (for 5–18 year olds). Phone counselling is available Monday to Friday, midday–11pm and weekends, 3pm–11pm.
Online chat is available 7pm–10pm daily Click HERE
They do say “Because a lot of young people use online chat, there is often a wait time before a counsellor is available. So if you need to speak to someone straight away, phone What’s Up and speak to a counsellor in person”
At Kidsline we think everyone needs to be heard, and we want to be here to talk things through with you, and listen to what’s happening to you. So give us a call, and talk to one of our Buddies!
0800 54 37 54 (0800 kidsline) for young people up to 18 years of age.
Kidsline is available 24/7 however if you ring between 4pm-9pm Monday – Friday you will speak to a Kidsline Buddy – a specially trained teenage telephone counsellor.
To get the lowdown on Helplines and what happens when you call, whether you are really anonymous and and heaps more info, check out the Sticks ‘n Stones website.
Nikita talks about chatting to someone over Snapchat and starting to really like him and then what happened when she said no to his request for nudes.
Lara talks about feeling pressured to send nudes to a guy she was seeing and how she was blamed after they were shared. She talks about the impact that had on her mental health and gives her advice for getting through.
Nat talks about getting a dick pic from a friend’s account and not being sure how to react. Later she finds out that his account had been hacked so lets him know what happened.
Shannon talks about when a photo was taken up her skirt at her school without her knowing and then shared.
Eve talks about sending nudes in a long term relationship and how this stayed positive.
Mia talks about chatting with a guy online for a few months and then sending nudes after he had asked and how he wouldn’t talk to her afterwards.
Beth shares about her experience with a guy using his charm to try to get a nude from her friend, and from her.
Bailey talks about sending a nude and then being blackmailed to send more.
Steph talks about being asked to send nudes from her boyfriend and what happened when she said no.
Anna talks about being contacted by a stranger on Snapchat and being offered money to send him nudes.
Kelly talks about getting a ‘dick pic’ randomly, what she did about it and how it made her feel.
Cody talks about what happened to one of his friend’s when the guy she was with videoed them having sex and then shared it in groups online.