Even if it is a one off post or photo, there are still a number of steps that you can take.
You do not need to wait for it to happen again or for it to get worse before you take steps to have something taken down.
Make a comment. Let the person or people who has posted the photo or made the comment(s) know that it is not ok and is actually hurtful.
Keep this simple and stay calm. They may be genuinely unaware that they are hurting your feelings.
Depending on your relationship with the person, you might be able to get in touch with them privately.
If this is out of character for the other person, this could be a sign that they are not in a good place themselves.
Getting in contact with them privately to let them know this seems unusual for them might help them to open up about what is going on. This might help get things resolved more quickly rather than retaliating.
Saying something like, “Hey, when you said…. that isn’t really like you. It was actually pretty hurtful. Is everything ok? “.
If it is making you or your family feel really bad, the content can be reported. If it causes shame or is degrading, it may breach the terms and conditions of Social Media Platforms.
You can report the content directly through the platform so it can be removed.
The more quickly the report is made, the less time the content stays online causing more hurt or embarrassment.
Check out the icons below for steps on how to do this for different platforms.
If you need help, advice or support with any kind of online issue, Netsafe can help.
They are a non-profit organisation with a helpline set up to help people with online safety and online issues.
Netsafe have years of experience in helping young people deal with harm online, their service is free and confidential.
Find out more by visiting their website or checking out the services section.
Take some time to chat to someone that you trust about what has been going on and how it has been making you feel.
Make sure you ask if they have time to talk so that you are not interrupted or they are not in a rush (or in a bad head space themselves).
They might have experienced something similar that they can tell you about. They might also have a different perspective or point of view that might help you look at the situation differently.
Talking it through (even if you do this via text or messaging) can help you work out your own solution or work out what is really getting to you.
Netsafe is an organisation that can provide information and support as well as free and confidential advice when you are being hurt or targeted online.
They can:
How to contact them
You can make a report through their website https://www.netsafe.org.nz/report/ or you can free phone them seven days a week between 8am and 5pm on 0508 NETSAFE.
What happens when I make a report?
You can make the report yourself, or someone can do it on your behalf.
When you phone them, they will ask you questions so they can understand what’s going on, how long it has been happening, who is involved, what evidence you have and any other information to help them to evaluate your report.
When you make a report online, you will be asked to select from a range of multi choice questions to give information about the situation and the support you (or the person you are making the report for) is receiving, give your contact information and also a ‘short summary’ of what happened.
You will also be asked how concerned you are for your safety.
Whether you make your report by phone or using the online form, you will be given a report number that will create a ‘thread’ of emails to keep all of the communication together.
If you make your report online, you will then receive an email confirming your report has been received and that one of the team will be in touch once they have evaluated it using the contact details you gave in the form.
Lara talks about a guy pretending to be her boyfriend on his Social Media and sharing details about ‘dates’ they had been on. She talks about the fact that people believe what they see online without questioning it.
Eve talks about her boyfriend logging into her social media account and sending messages which led to issues for her.
Ellie talks about having a Tinder profile set up in her name and what she did about it.
Jack talks about finding out someone was impersonating him on Grindr and getting the account taken down.
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